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16 September 2007 @ 01:15 am
Fic: Happy Holidays  
Title: Happy Holidays
Pairing: Sirius/Snape (Marauder’s Era)
Rating: R
Warnings: Underage sex, mild alcohol use, mild fluff.
Disclaimer: Alas, nothing is mine.
Summary: Sirius and Snape get together on Christmas Eve.
A/N: Seventh part in my WIP Snack series. Previous parts are Midnight Company, Best Laid Plans, Mischief Managed, Revelations and Realizations, The One That Really Matters and Moste Potente Potions.

Sorry for the crappy title but my brain was totally blank when I was naming this part. Feedback is much appreciated!

Happy Holidays

Sirius blinked once, twice and found his eyes felt heavy. It was a huge effort to force them open. Stretching his arms, Sirius found them stiff and sore. It felt like he’d been lying in the same position for ages. His heart rate quickened as realization dawned on him. His eyes were suddenly wide open and his hands shot up to his face. Sirius felt around for a beard but his fingers only found smooth skin. He sighed with relief. So he hadn’t gone to sleep and woken up in his thirties.

His eyes were slowly getting accustomed to the darkness around him and Sirius found himself from the hospital wing. It was dead quiet and he guessed it was around midnight - he'd taken the potion exactly 48 hours ago. A a clear, starry sky was visible through the vast windows. The glass was full of small frost crystals and it looked like the temperature outside was several degrees below zero. Sirius sat up in his bed. His stomach gave a leap of joy as he realized it was the night before Christmas Eve, and he wasn’t in his old room in their London apartment. He was at Hogwarts where his mother’s disapproving eyes and endless supply of insults couldn’t reach him.

Sirius was suddenly wide awake and full of energy. He looked around and noticed there was something piled on the chair near his bedside. He got up, grimacing as his bare feet touched the cold stone floor and began to investigate the objects. Sirius found his robes and a set of neatly folded clothes. On top of them were three presents and a letter. Sirius took the letter and returned to his bed, his eyes still fixed on the presents. One of them was wrapped neatly in a gift paper filled with small stars. The other two were less graceful and Sirius guessed the one with a brown paper bag around it had to be from Peter.

Sirius got back underneath the covers and turned his attention to the letter. He ripped it open and held it close to his eyes so he could make out the words in the darkness. Sirius recognized the handwriting immediately and knew the letter was from James. His conscience began to eat alive him as soon as he had finished the first line. The frown on his face only deepened, as he read on.

The letter revealed what had happened in the morning after he had consumed the Sleeping Draught. Sirius learned he had been taken to Madam Pomfrey and the school healer had sent an owl to his parents. She had also been curious to know who in Merlin's name had brewed him such a strong brand of sleeping draught. And James, it seemed, was already suspecting Snape and blaming the Slytherin for trying to poison Sirius. He had written something about a box of Chocolate Frogs but Sirius had no idea what his friend was talking about. James was promising him they would fix the slimy git after the holidays. There was only one thing in the letter that didn't make Sirius frown. James had left him the invisibility cloak so he could sneak into the kitchens in case he didn't sleep through the holidays.

Sirius folded the note and slipped it back inside the torn envelope. The letter had filled his mind with dread. But he refused to spend his Christmas worrying; he would find a way to redirect James' suspicions after the holidays. Sirius lay down and pressed his head deep into the soft pillow. Watching the large windows, he fixed his gaze on the bright stars and began to look for familiar constellations. And despite being full of energy only moments ago, he fell asleep somewhere between Orion's belt and his own titular star.


Sirius was already up and pulling his shirt on when Madam Pomfrey stepped into her office the next morning. She was surprised and delighted to see her young patient was awake and in good health. After some fussing and a little bustling, she released Sirius and wished him happy holidays. Sirius pulled his robes on and made his way out of the hospital wing. The first floor corridors were abandoned and the silence was quite eerie. But as he got closer to the marble staircase, a merry singing reached his ears. There was a group of ghosts in the Entrance Hall, entertaining everyone with different carols.

Sirius hadn't eaten in two days and nights and it felt like there was a hole where his stomach used to be. He hurried past the ghosts and headed toward the Great Hall. Sirius stopped in the doorway and stared at the joyful sight. There were several huge Christmas trees, so full of decorations that the green needles were hardly visible. The walls were covered in garland and holly, and there was a blazing fire in the large fireplace near the vacant Gryffindor table. Glancing up, Sirius saw bewitched snow falling down from the high ceiling.

He took a step forward and turned his eyes to the Slytherin table. In his usual spot at the end of the table sat Severus Snape. Their eyes met and Severus straightened up in his seat. He watched Sirius from under his brows, his face half hidden behind his dark hair. He tugged it behind his ears and Sirius thought he saw a relieved glint in the Slytherin's black eyes. Had Severus been worried about him? Sirius headed toward him, but froze after two steps. He glanced at the five other Slytherins who were shooting suspicious looks in his direction. He turned on his heels and headed for the other side of the room. Walking away, Sirius glanced over his shoulder and gave Severus a quick smirk. It turned into a wide grin when he saw the Slytherin repay it with an awkward smile of his own.

The Gryffindor table was empty, but Sirius took a seat at their usual spot. He was soon joined by five third year girls who kept glancing in his direction, giggling and batting their lashes at him. The long table was filled with food, even if only a fraction of the students were there to eat it. Sirius piled his plate with everything he could reach. He took a drink from his goblet and let his eyes sweep the spacious room. The House tables were unnaturally empty, but Sirius rather liked it this way. In addition to the remaining Slytherins and Gryffindors, a handful of Ravenclaws and Hufflepuffs had stayed behind as well. There were a few vacant seats at the staff table, but most of the teachers were present.

When he was done with his breakfast, Sirius got up from his seat and started toward the exit. Glancing over his shoulder, he saw that Severus was trailing behind him a safe distance away. Once he'd reached the Entrance Hall, Sirius waited for Severus by the marble staircase. When the Slytherin emerged through the doorway, he was accompanied by his remaining house mates. There was a group of five, but Sirius could only name three of them. He thought one of them was called Travers and the other two Mulciber and Avery. Severus gave Sirius a furtive glance as he walked past him, his face shadowed by the usual curtain of stringy hair. The Slytherins were guiding him down the staircase that led to the dungeons and Sirius's brow furrowed as he watched them disappear from sight. Heading upstairs, Sirius stuck his hands into his pockets and let out a frustrated groan. He had hoped to exchange a few words with Severus, but the group of Slytherins had ruined his chance.


Sirius climbed in through the portrait hole and found the Gryffindor common room empty. The large fireplace was alight with warm flames and a pale blue winter sky was visible through the tall windows. Sirius climbed the stairs into their dormitory. No one had been there for two days and the room was cold and quiet. Sirius got a fire going in the heater and walked to his trunk. He found James' invisibility cloak and the Marauder's Map inside. He decided to take his friend's advice to visit the kitchens. Not for the food, but something better. If he wanted to get beyond groping in the classroom or kissing by the Black Lake, Sirius knew Severus would have to relax a notch. He was about to close the trunk when he laid his eyes on three poorly wrapped presents. He was supposed to hand them out in the Hogwarts Express as usual, but that was before the change in the plan. Reaching for the presents, Sirius decided to make a trip to the Owlery as well.

After putting his friend's gifts on their way, Sirius left the Owlery and headed for the kitchens. He descended the staircase from the cavernous Entrance Hall and made his way down the long corridor where the walls were filled with pictures of food. When he reached the one with a bowl of fruit, Sirius took out the invisibility cloak and disappeared. He tickled the pear and watched it turn into a door handle.

Sirius slipped in through a narrow crack in the doorway and glanced around. None of the House elves had noticed anything. They were busy preparing lunch and Christmas Eve dinner and the large room was filled with the sound of their pattering feet. It seemed that every single pot and pan was steaming and the air in the room was hot and damp. Sirius took a deep breath under the invisibility cloak as his clothes began to feel too warm. He walked toward the large fireplace that stood at the other end, careful not to collide with the bustling elves. There was a mahogany cabinet next to the fireplace. Sirius stopped in front of it and glanced around. He pulled one of the cabinet doors open and grinned at the sight. Every shelf inside was filled with bottles of the Wizarding world's finest alcohol. Sirius studied the labels and tried to decide what to take with him. There were different qualities of fine wine, Single Malt Whiskey, Ogden's Old Firewhiskey and rows of sherry and rum. Sirius bit his lip, considering each bottle. In the end he decided to go with Ogden's because that was the stuff his mother drank, which meant it couldn't be bad.


Sirius hadn't seen Severus during lunch and he was absent on dinner as well. He had studied the Marauder's Map and kept an eye out for Severus all day, but he hadn't caught his name amid the remaining students. He hoped Severus hadn't forgotten their plan to spend the evening together. When Sirius left the Great Hall after dinner, he found the Slytherin sitting at the bottom of the marble staircase, apparently waiting for him. Severus stood up and looked around to make sure the room was empty. He gave Sirius a questioning look and received a small nod. Sirius began to climb the staircase, glancing over his shoulder to make sure that Severus was following. When they reached the moving staircases, he turned around to face the Slytherin.

“Here, put this on,” Sirius said and took out the invisibility cloak and handed it to Severus. The smaller boy watched it with wide eyes, turning it around in his hands. Judging by the look on his face, Severus had a hard time believing Sirius was actually entrusting the cloak to him, even if he was only borrowing it to get inside the Gryffindor common room. He threw the cloak around him and disappeared from sight. Sirius blinked at the empty spot, feeling uncomfortable as his old distrust for the Slytherin returned momentarily. He had given Severus the cloak that had been in James's family for generations. But the feeling passed and Sirius began to climb the stairs, trusting Severus was following close behind. They reached the seventh floor and Sirius led the way toward the Fat Lady's portrait. He gave her a password and she swung aside to reveal the hidden passage. Sirius climbed in, hoping Severus had done the same.


Severus had managed to stumble in through the hole just before the painting had sealed it. Holding the silky cloak above his head, he could hear his own breathing in his ears as he followed Sirius. His heart was hammering with a mixture of nervous excitement. He was inside the Gryffindor common room – a place he most certainly wasn't supposed to see. It was almost like sneaking into enemy territory. He was taken aback as he realized Sirius trusted him enough to bring him here.

The large room was quiet but Severus noticed there were three young Gryffindor girls sitting in the large armchairs near the fireplace. They all turned their heads in their direction as Sirius led the way toward a spiral staircase. The walls were covered in maroon and gold rugs and large portraits. It was a very different sight compared to the Slytherin common room down in the chilly dungeons. The feeling that he was trespassing began to grow in his chest and Severus licked his lips nervously. Sirius began to climb the staircase and paused to look behind his back. Severus stood only a few inches away and Sirius was staring past his right shoulder.

“Are you there?” the Gryffindor whispered and Severus touched his shoulder blade to make his presence known.

They climbed up the rest of the stairs and stepped into a small dormitory. It was dimly lit and several degrees warmer than the one Severus shared with three other fifth year Slytherins. Sirius turned around and his grey eyes searched the room. When Severus threw the cloak aside, the Gryffindor jumped a little and turned to face him. Severus folded the cloak and held it in his arms as he took in his surroundings. Sirius moved to sit on one of the mahogany four-poster beds and patted the mattress with his right hand.

“This one is mine,” he said as Severus remained in the doorway. “That one is Peter's and Remus and James sleep over there.” He pointed at the remaining three beds in the circular room. Severus frowned at the mention of the three Marauders. He blinked nervously as the feeling that he shouldn't be there got stronger. Sirius seemed to notice his discomfort. He got up hastily and changed the subject. “So, I guess I should thank you,” he began, leaning one hand against the iron grating that circled the heater. “The potion worked perfectly.”

“Of course it did,” Seveurs said in a matter-of-factly tone. Sirius didn't need to know he'd actually had some doubts. Severus allowed his muscles to relax a notch and walked over to Sirius's four-poster bed. He sat down and set the cloak on the maroon covers. The Gryffindor joined him in a heartbeat and Severus felt the mattress slump under their combined weight. The hands in his lap turned into tight fists and his gaze was fixed on the worn carpet.

Sirius didn't speak but he was suddenly hovering over Severus's chest and reaching for the pillows. Severus blinked in surprise and leaned back. He watched as the other boy drew out a bottle filled with amber liquid. Severus's brow furrowed as he realized the content was clearly alcoholic. Was this what the sly Gryffindor had had in mind all along? Sirius would get him so drunk he'd agree to practically anything. “Firewhiskey,” Severus said flatly, pursing his lips in disgust. “I hope you don't expect me to drink that stuff.”


Sirius began to uncork the stolen bottle. He could tell Severus wasn't too pleased with the sudden appearance of the Firewhiskey. The Slytherin probably thought Sirius was planning to get him so pissed he couldn't do anything to resist him. But Sirius merely wanted Severus to relax. They were only sitting on his bed but the other boy was already all wound up. “Well, if you're too scared,” Sirius jeered and gave Severus a playful sneer. The Slytherin arched his brows, the look on his face offended.

“I'd like to see you give it a try,” Severus said pointedly.

Sirius straightened up and gave Severus a defiant look. He brought the bottle up to his nose and inhaled. The amber liquid inside gave a heady smell. Sirius watched Severus from the corner of his eye. The Slytherin had fixed his keen eyes on him and wore an expectant look on his face. Sirius cleared his throat and tried to look like he had done this a dozen times.

Taking a deep breath, Sirius lifted the bottle to his lips and got his first taste of alcohol. The Firewhiskey burned like acid as it slid down his throat. The name was definitely appropriate. Sirius felt his eyes water and he began to cough furiously. How could his mother enjoy something that made your innards boil? Amid his coughing, Sirius heard an unfamiliar sound that made him turn his head in Severuss direction. The Slytherin was laughing at him, his mouth curving up in amusement!

“Think that's funny, do you?” Sirius asked, his tone a mixture of half-hearted anger and playfulness. He shoved the bottle in Severus's hands and gave him a pointed look. “I think it's your turn now,” he said. “I mean, you're not a coward, are you?”

“Fine,” Severus hissed softly. He brought the bottle to his lips and drank. Sirius's eyes widened as he watched the Slytherin's Adam's apple bob underneath the white skin of his throat. Lowering the bottle, Severus, too, gave a furious cough and his eyes were suddenly swimming with tears. He handed the bottle back to Sirius and arched his brows. “There,” Severus said, as if waiting for Sirius to acknowledge that he was not a coward. Sirius gave him an approving nod, squeezed his eyes shut, and took another swing of Firewhiskey.


The sun had set hours ago and the weather outside was frosty. But inside the dimly lit dormitory it was warm. There were small oil lamps on the tables at each bedside, and the fire in the heater cast long shadows on the stone walls. Severus could feel the alcohol burning in his stomach, its warmth spreading pleasantly all over his body. His head felt heavy and he leaned it against the mattress of Sirius's four-poster. They had slid down on the floor some time ago and the bottle of Firewhiskey lay half empty at their feet. Sirius sat next to him with his legs slightly sprawled. Their shoulders were pressed together and Severus could feel Sirius's body heat radiating through the grey jumper he wore.

Severus had been afraid the Firewhiskey would make him lose control. But it had merely given him a pleasant, carefree feeling. His senses were weakened, but Severus was definitely in control of his mind. His body was a different story, but it wasn't that important. They hadn't exchanged many words after Sirius had uncorked the bottle, but the silence didn't feel uncomfortable. They both knew there were too many sensitive topics that could spark a huge row, and it was as if there was an unspoken agreement between them to avoid any arguments on this particular night.

Severus watched the fire in the heater and felt Sirius move beside him. The Gryffindor turned his face in his direction, his thick hair brushing against Severus's shoulder. “Can I ask you something?” Sirius whispered, his voice soft and somewhat slurred by the alcohol. Severus gave him an assessing look and nodded. “Why didn't you go home for the holidays?” Sirius asked and Severus's brow furrowed at his words. The Gryffindor had apparently decided to ignore their agreement.


Sirius watched the the other boy apprehensively, his heart hammering under his ribcage. Severus remained silent and Sirius was beginning to regret his question. It had made the Slytherin visibly uncomfortable and reserved. The pleasant buzzing in his brain seemed to disappear when he saw Severus get on his feet. Sirius watched him sway slightly and then turn his back on him. He stumbled up after Severus and felt the full effect of the alcohol. His head spun as he tried to fix his gaze on the dark figure in front of him. “Snape?” Sirius whispered in a small voice. Severus didn't answer and Sirius glanced around, trying to think of a way to get his words back. “Okay, just... Just forget I asked-” He jumped when the other boy suddenly whirled around and fixed him with a piercing look. Sirius stumbled back as his mind was invaded by a blur of hazy images.

He could see a flash of grey sky above a bleak horizon. Towering in the distance were factory chimneys and black columns of smoke. A brown river ran nearby. There was another flash and Sirius saw a cobbled road and a rusty old sign that read 'Spinner's End'. There was a run-down brick rowhouse and a familiar looking scrawny child stood outside the door in his nightclothes. It seemed to be winter and very late in the evening. Sirius could hear raised voices inside the house. Another flash. Sirius saw a small and dank-looking sitting room. He could tell it was Christmas because there was a small tree in one dark corner. His heart began to beat faster when he saw a thin woman lying unconscious on the floor. Looking around, Sirius laid his eyes on a small figure, hunched between a worn couch and a bookcase. He could tell the young boy was hugging his knees and sitting very quietly. All that was visible were the whites of his frantic black eyes. With another flash, the vision ended.

Sirius blinked, feeling suddenly very sober. He stared at Severus who was lowering his face, his eyes darting across the carpet. Sirius could still feel his heart hammering in his chest. What the hell was that? How did Severus make those images appear in his head? Was it a spell? The shots had been blurry and vague but Sirius had definitely received an answer to his question. He realized how personal and private those memories undoubtedly were. He had a strong feeling Severus hadn't shared them with anyone else. It made him feel very uncomfortable. He didn't know what to say. Sirius felt sorry for Severus, but he knew that was the last thing the Slytherin would want to hear. Taking a hesitant step forward, he cleared his throat. “I... didn't know,” Sirius said in a low voice.

Severus raised his head and the look on his face was blank. “Why would you?” he said in a cold voice. “You don't know anything about me. The only time you ever talked to me was when you or Potter were pointing your wands at me.”

Sirius didn't reply. He knew Severus was right, even though the Slytherin made it sound like he himself was completely innocent. And Sirius knew he wasn't. Severus had a mean streak and he possessed a vicious tongue and wasn't afraid to use it. But Sirius didn't want to argue, not tonight. Sensing there was a potential argument in the air, he decided to act. They didn't have many things to talk about; there were simply too many secrets and too many years of mutual hatred. And Sirius accepted it. But that didn't mean he would let the evening end here.

He took a step forward and closed the distance between them. Sirius laid his hands on Severus's shoulders and leaned in to kiss him. Severus pulled back but Sirius followed and pressed their lips together. Severus brought his hands between them, pressed his palms against Sirius's chest and tried to push him away. Despite the Firewhiskey they had consumed, the Slytherin’s lips were unyielding. But as Sirius’s own lips grew more persistent, he could feel the other boy was slowly unwinding.

The fire in the heater gave a crackle and bright flames made their shadows jump on the walls. Severus was finally parting his lips and Sirius used the opportunity to deepen the kiss. The hands on his chest were clenching his jumper and Sirius was allowed to lean closer. Severus's smaller frame was docile in his hands and the warm buzzing had returned, making his muscles pleasantly relaxed. The Firewhiskey had given him more confidence, not that he lacked it to begin with, and pressing their bodies together, Sirius was slowly guiding them toward the bed. Severus began to pull back, guessing his intentions. Sirius broke the kiss and saw the look on Severus's face was withdrawn and visibly nervous, though he was trying very hard to hide it under a scowl. Neither of them had said it out loud, but they both knew where this evening was supposed to lead.

Sirius could see patches of red on the Slytherin's pale skin and he guessed it wasn't from the alcohol alone. He loosened the grip he had on Severus's shoulders and lowered his hands to the hem of his grey jumper. The smaller boy stepped back as soon as Sirius attempted to remove it. He let go of the shirt and pulled his hands back. Sirius had hoped the Firewhiskey would help Severus relax, but apparently it wasn't strong enough to fix the Slytherin's low self-esteem.

Despite their meetings in the past, this was the first time they would be completely naked in front of each other, and Severus seemed to visibly dread it. Seeing the anguish on his face, Sirius decided to go first. He began to pull his shirt over his head and though he possessed a very high self-esteem, the Slytherin's nervousness seemed to rub on him. But he couldn't think of any other way to break the ice, and tossing the shirt aside, he tried to appear as calm as possible. Sirius had been naked in front of other people countless times. They had to shower after every Quidditch practice. But this felt personal and private, and though he knew he had nothing to be ashamed of, Sirius felt himself blush.

Stepping closer, he grabbed the hem of Severus's jumper for a second time. Watching the expression on his face, Sirius began to remove it. He smiled when Severus raised his arms and allowed him to pull the shirt over his head. Sirius tossed it on the floor and took in the scrawny body in front of him. The Slytherin was very pale and he seemed to shrink back under Sirius's gaze. His shoulders were round and the muscles in his upper body were soft and somewhat undeveloped. His body was hairless, save for a dark patch that ran down from his navel. Sirius averted his gaze, sensing the other's discomfort.

He took Severus by his shoulders and sat him down on the bed. The Slytherin refused to meet his eyes and Sirius could tell he wasn't any less nervous. He glanced around and laid his eyes on the small oil lamps. “Hold on,” he said and made his way to Remus's bedside. He blew the lamp out and the room became slightly darker. Making his way around the circular room, Sirius extinguished the remaining lamps. When the flickering flames in the heater were the only source of light left, Sirius made his way back and sat down beside Severus.

Despite being pleasantly drunk, they sat in awkward silence. Severus was clenching his hands around his knees and Sirius watched his white knuckles from the corner of his eye. He moved his gaze up to the Slytherin's pale chest. The warm fire gave it a slightly orange tint. Severus sat with his back hunched and his posture made him appear small. His stomach was bent and the muscles contracted with every intake of breath. Sirius turned his eyes to his own body. He had a lean build, but the hours of Quidditch he had played were definitely visible in his toned muscles.

Sirius laid his hand on Severus's bare shoulder and the pale skin felt warm under his fingers. He rubbed his thumb in small circles and tried to spy the expression on Severus's face. Strands of black hair hung in the way and Sirius moved his hand up to the Slytherin's cheek. Severus blinked furiously as Sirius tugged his dark hair behind his ear.

Sirius sneaked his fingers behind Severus's neck and began to pull him in for a kiss. Severus didn't hold back and Sirius brought their lips together. The kiss was slow and less awkward than he had expected. Severus’s right hand clenched and unclenched and as they continued to kiss and Sirius could feel it settle above his own knee. Feeling encouraged by the touch, he pressed his right palm against the Slytherin's narrow chest while his left hand, still guiding the kiss, twined in the black hair. They had achieved a nice, slow rhythm and Sirius began to feel the first signs of arousal in the pit of his stomach. The hand on his knee was clenching his trousers and tightening its hold. They were breathing through their noses and the kiss was beginning to grow sloppy and fervent.

The windows were glimmering with small frost crystals and the evening had turned into night. In half an hour it would be Christmas Day. Sirius twined his fingers in the Slytherin's long hair and used his hold to guide him down on the mattress. Severus broke the kiss, out of breath, as Sirius lowered his larger body on top of him. He leaned closer and looked Severus straight in the eye. The smaller boy held his gaze but Sirius could see his black eyes were glinting nervously. The warm buzz in his brain gave way to reason and concern. “Are you okay with this?” Sirius whispered, his breath ghosting over Severus's cheek. And with his half-hard erection pressing into the Slytherin's thigh, it was very clear what he was talking about. Severus considered his question for a long moment. And when he finally nodded, Sirius leaned down and grinned into the mass of dark hair. He had thought about this for weeks. And he was surprised to find himself more eager than nervous. He realized the Firewhiskey he'd stolen had done its job.

Knowing that Severus was willing to continue, Sirius allowed his movements to become more uninhibited and eager. His hands were traveling up and down the scrawny flanks and the Slytherin was responding to his every touch. His chest was rising rapidly against Sirius's and his feet were tangling in the maroon sheets. But Severus's own hands were still somewhat hesitant to touch him, so Sirius took hold of his left arm and brought it to his lower back. Severus let the hand rest above his belt but as Sirius leaned down to kiss him, the hand began to move up and down his back. The kiss deepened and Sirius began to thrust with his hips.

He brought his left hand between them and pressed his palm against Severus's warm chest. He took one small nipple between his fingers and gave it a light squeeze. Severus sighed quietly into their kiss. Their hips kept moving; thrusting, seeking friction. Sirius felt the muscles in his neck twitch with anticipation. His hormone-addled brain was telling him to quit stalling and to proceed. And pressing his face into the hollow of Severus's damp neck, Sirius reached down and began to open his belt with one hand. His eager fingers were clumsy and he swore under his breath. Sirius felt long and nimble fingers join his own and the belt buckle came open. “Thanks,” he whispered as he began to kick out of his trousers. Sirius managed to get his legs free and his trousers, along with his underwear, fell on the floor. The muscles in his arms contracted as he lifted his body up to allow Severus some room to undress.

Their pants lay discarded on the old and worn carpet and the fire crackled in the heater. Sirius lowered himself down slowly. Severus was shivering underneath him and watching him with lust filled eyes. “You still okay with this?” Sirius asked, shaking with the self-restraint he was showing. He wanted to thrust down but he was afraid he wouldn't last long if he let his body have its way. Severus was gripping the sheets and though he still seemed slightly hesitant, Sirius could tell he was past saying no to him. The Slytherin nodded and Sirius gave him a wide grin. “Okay,” he whispered and glanced around. He had to think for a while; this time Severus wasn't the only one who was inexperienced and Sirius didn't want to get anything wrong.

Severus watched Sirius with curious eyes as he got up from the bed. He went through his robes which were folded on top of his trunk. Sirius retrieved his wand and made his way back to bed. He pulled at the sheets and motioned for Severus to lift his body. They both got under the covers and Sirius settled between Severus's parted legs. Severus watched him with unblinking eyes and Sirius tried to remember the spell he had memorized weeks ago. There was a flash of blue light from his wand and Severus gasped at the sudden coolness that had spread between his legs.

Sirius put his wand aside and leaned down. Using his right arm to support his weight, he pressed the tip of his nose into Severus's soft cheek. Sirius's left hand disappeared under the covers as he began to guide himself inside.

“Relax,” he whispered. Severus was clenching his hands in the maroon sheets and Sirius could feel his chest rise against his own with his rapid breathing. “Sorry,” he said, aware of the pain he was causing.

Sirius continued to thrust in, and as the tightness enveloped him, he lost control of his movements. His hips jerked of their own accord and the hand supporting his weight gave out. He pressed his face against the Slytherin's neck and groaned into his sweaty shoulder. The tightness and pressure were too much. It felt too good and Sirius had to thrust in all the way. Severus's hands twined in Sirius's hair, and as he quickened the pace, the hold on his hair grew painfully tight. But Sirius allowed it, thinking it was only fair.

He moved his hips and slid in and out, sweat pouring down his back as he forced himself to take it slowly. It was a strange mixture of pain and pleasure. The warm tightness sent his body on overdrive, but Severus pulled his hair with every single thrust. His movements were erratic and clumsy but Sirius didn't think Severus was paying too much attention to his performance. Sirius wanted to grip the Slytherin's fading erection and make him feel good, but it was a huge effort to keep from thrusting in too hard. “Touch yourself,” he croaked between thrusts, and when the hand in his hair lowered between them, Sirius gave Severus a pleased grin.
Sirius knew he wouldn't be able to last for long. His orgasm was already building in the pit of his stomach, while Severus was just starting to get hard again. Sirius's thrusts became more random and it was harder to keep his movements gentle. And though he would've liked to find his release together with Severus, he couldn't prevent himself from coming. Sirius buried himself inside the smaller boy, his whole body trembling. He collapsed on top of Severus,feeling ecstatic.

“You're crushing me,” Severus whispered. Blinking his eyes, Sirius used his arms to lift his weight away from the Slytherin's chest. He moved aside and laid down next to Severus. Sirius took the smaller boy in his arms, pressed his chest against Severus's back and reached for his arousal. It was hard in his hand and Sirius didn't waste any time as he began a series of firm strokes. Severus jerked in his arms once, twice and he was coming.

The body in his arms grew still and Severus untangled himself and turned to lie on his back. Sirius reached for his wand and cleared the mess they had made. He pulled the covers up to their bare shoulders and glanced at Severus. The Slytherin was watching the flickering flames in the heater, chewing on his lower lip. “Does it... hurt?” Sirius asked in a low voice.

Severus didn't avert his eyes from the fire but he gave a small nod. “Maybe a bit,” he lied.

The narrow bed creaked as Sirius turned to lie on his side and threw one arm over the Slytherin's chest. He closed his eyes and the remaining alcohol in his blood made his head spin. Severus's heart was beating in a steady rhythm under his palm and the crackling of the fire became more and more distant in his ears. Every muscle in his body felt relaxed and Sirius didn't remember the last time he had felt this content. Growing slowly oblivious to his surroundings, Sirius drifted off to sleep.

Air Unzbuzzler: charmingherbailiwick on September 16th, 2007 06:40 am (UTC)
Their first time was so awkwardly, painfully sweet. I loved it.
not telling!: Siriusyorda_ on September 16th, 2007 08:44 am (UTC)
Yeah, it was definitely awkward :) I knew I could have made it hot and perfect like something out of a romance novel, but I decided to go with awkward and a bit more realistic. I mean, no one has a perfect first time, right?
Arethinnarethinn on September 17th, 2007 03:53 am (UTC)
Awkward and realistic so much better, ya.
not telling!: Snape OotPyorda_ on September 17th, 2007 11:24 am (UTC)
I think so too :)
ficklefeline on September 16th, 2007 09:04 am (UTC)
Sirius should have had some healing ointment on hand so he could heal Severus's soreness manually. Which would of course lead to more sex. Afterall practice makes perfect. And it is doubtful that Severus will be so quick to agree especially w/o the help of firewhiskey.
not telling!: Siriusyorda_ on September 17th, 2007 11:37 am (UTC)
Yeah, some healing ointment would've been good. How did Sirius not think of that if he's been planning the sex for weeks ;)
senjism on September 16th, 2007 10:29 am (UTC)
*big sappy grin*

I love awkward first time sex. brilliantly done
not telling!: Snape OotPyorda_ on September 17th, 2007 11:26 am (UTC)
Thank you kindly :)
dramapunk: our housedramapunk on September 17th, 2007 01:58 am (UTC)
ha that was fantastically awkward. keep up the good work
Arethinn: amused (snape lulz)arethinn on September 17th, 2007 03:50 am (UTC)
I like your icon, although it does make me wonder what goes with "sister's sighing in her sleep". ;)
dramapunk: get itdramapunk on September 17th, 2007 04:38 am (UTC)
I bet "Sister" is thinking of Sirius and Severus getting it on... :D

Thanks btw, I made it myself.
not telling!: Siriusyorda_ on September 17th, 2007 11:28 am (UTC)
Thanksies! I've already finished the first drafts of the final part and the epilogue but I'm a revising maniac, so it'll be a few days before I'll post the next part.
dramapunkdramapunk on September 17th, 2007 02:46 pm (UTC)
No worries take your time. Writers shouldn't be rushed I know. But then I am a deadline queen. as well as a revising queen which is a hard combo.
Arethinn: snape (collar)arethinn on September 17th, 2007 03:48 am (UTC)
Sorry for the crappy title but my brain was totally blank when I was naming this part.

How about "Christmas Is Coming" ?

Since, you know, it's not quite Christmas. And, um, the other stuff. *koff*
not telling!: Snape OotPyorda_ on September 17th, 2007 11:29 am (UTC)
How about "Christmas Is Coming" ?

That would've been much better, me thinks :D Well, at least I won't have trouble naming the final part...
nwhikernwhiker on September 17th, 2007 04:45 am (UTC)
Aaaaah.... so hot. And yes, awkward.

I loved it. Just everything about it, Sirius not quite as sure of himself as he'd like, Snape nervous and more than anything, Snape lying about how much it hurt.

Such tenderness.
not telling!: Snape OotPyorda_ on September 17th, 2007 11:35 am (UTC)
I had to do a lot of thinking before I began to write this part, you know, how to do the sex scene without making them completely OOC. Although, when you're going for the more romantic kind of relationship with these two, they're bound to be a bit OOC. Anyway, I'm so glad you're still enjoying the story. One more part to go, plus an epilogue.
Air Unzbuzzler: justinitforsnapeherbailiwick on September 18th, 2007 04:15 am (UTC)
I agree, I loved when Snape lied about the pain.
rabid_fangrrlrabid_fangrrl on September 25th, 2007 04:08 pm (UTC)
So I've been away from the intrawebz for a while and now I am finally sorta starting to catch up with my flist.
Holy cow! This was really truly amazing. It fully captured the awkwardness of the moment and it was really just beautiful. I was touched by Sirius's response to Snape's childhood; the interaction felt honest.
And Snape fibbing @ the end, to what- spare Sirius's feelings? For the sake of his own pride? Hmmm.... And Sirius getting his snuggle on? YESH!

Everyone wants to snuggle a Slytherin!
not telling!: Snape OotPyorda_ on September 26th, 2007 05:41 am (UTC)
This was really truly amazing. It fully captured the awkwardness of the moment and it was really just beautiful.

Thank you so very much :) That's exactly what I hoped to achieve.